Sunday, January 31, 2010

Warranty

I warn you now, this post is a jumbled mess of thoughts. The fact that most of my thoughts follow this pattern is completely irrelevant.

Master phoned last night. I had hoped all day long that he would and I am utterly convinced that he phoned on his own accord. It had nothing to do with my 20+ attempts throughout the day to get his attention. Not a thing. I go through days where I am perfectly fine with him being busy and us not speaking a lot for a few days.  Than there are other times where I would give a favoured body part to climb into his pocket. He tells me I can’t live in his pocket, that I won’t fit. That may be but I am more than willing to try.

Anyways, back to the phone call(I sidetrack easily, you’ll get used to it). We spent a very small portion of said call talking about my diet and exercise. The diet I haven’t been doing bad on. Not great, but not horrible. The exercise on the other hand has been lacking. When I say lacking I mean it hasn’t happened in months and try as I might master says kegels do not count. I think they should, they’re called kegel exercises after all. I have to put together an exercise routine that lasts fifteen minutes twice a day. Can I handle more? Most likely, but we’re restarting me off slow. The last time master had me on the treadmill for forty-five minutes every day. I could do it, but after a week or so I ended up in bed for about four days completely unable to move. . Master told me that the time limit was so I didn’t hurt myself. I think he knew that I’d push to do whatever time he gave me so he’s being cautious.  If I remember correctly he told me “You’re my toy. You aren’t allowed to break my toy!” Turns out my warranty is the shits.

The rest of the phone call we spent playing around. He kept telling me that I was his and I belonged to him and continually made his possession very well-known. By the end of the conversation I was in a little submissive puddle, mentally, emotionally and physically. I love when he does that. I stay calm and happy for days afterwards.

Today I didn’t feel like doing much so I spent most of my time flitting around on the computer. I found a couple recipes I think master would like so I’ve filed them away for later use. I love to cook, having somebody to cook for is not helping the obsession.

Having some place to write is something I have been missing. I love to write stories (and draw) but I’ve had a severe creativity block. It’s been almost a year since I’ve actually been able to just sit down and write. I think with writing here it may slowly come back to me. It’s a good thing too, I was preparing to bribe my muse with nefarious acts and candy. ( This whole little girl role is starting to go to my head. I imagined my muse trapped in a cage spreading pixie dust everywhere trying to get out)

I have posts percolating and trying their best to form something of substance. Hopefully in the next little while I'll be able to work them out. They are still fragments of thoughts right now and are probably only coherent to me.

Saturday, January 30, 2010

First Post

I've been staring at a blank blogging screen for several minutes now unsure of where to start. I suppose there is no better place to start than at the beginning so here it is.

   My name is K and I am an owned submissive. My master found me on a networking site about two years ago and decided to send me a message. I'd like to say that things clicked instantly and we have been inseparable since. However, this is not the case. After a while of exchanging messages we started talking on an instant messenger and I quickly learned that he was in an open relationship. Having just gotten out of a bad relationship myself I was cautious of him and decided to shrug him off and keep him in the occasional conversation category. He of course had other plans.

   I was fresh enough out of my last relationship that I was still upset about it and every time I needed to talk the man whom I had written off was right there. After about a month of this I finally gave in and decided to actually talk to him. Things progressed into learning about one another's likes and dislikes and discussing any random topic that either of us could think of, then one day he stopped going on to the computer. Every time I would log on I would instinctively look along my contact list for his name but it wasn't there. When this happened I began to miss him, which surprised me considering I wasn't expecting to get attached to somebody I had never met. Finally one day after what seemed like months (though it was probably weeks) he reappeared. Turns out he had moved to a city two hours away from where I was.

  We continued with our talks and they progressively became longer and more frequent and much dirtier. At this point I stopped looking for a boyfriend and put most of my focus on this man. A few months after that happened his open relationship ended and he was single. Since neither of us really knew what to call what it was we were doing so we went on for about a month where nothing was defined or exclusive. It wasn't a serious relationship. Like all things tend to do with us it progressed in that month until around christmas he brought up the idea of being my master and daddy. At first I was unsure but agreed to try.

   That was over a year ago now, and I've been his little girl since that day.

   In that time I've learned that I have always been submissive. I always wanted my boyfriend's permission to get a piercing or a haircut and became frustrated when I was told "It's your body," or "It's up to you, I want you to have freedom." Since master came along I have been much happier and more content in the things I do and who I am.

    Right now my master is on the other side of the country for work and I miss him everyday. I got very used to talking to him everyday and texting him all day, some of my rules require this. However, now his job keeps him busy so our talking has lessened some(though master puts a lot of effort into talking with me when he can. I'm not particularly upset by this, I know he tries and besides that I'm comforted by the fact that he doesn't text while driving. It's best for his safety..and those around him. His driving is scary enough on its own.). Because of these things I decided that a blog may be helpful, he can read it when he has time and it lets me get my thoughts out without having to text him a million times a day. He says he enjoys my texts, and he may, but I irritate myself sending them all the time. So, that is what this place will be. A place for my thoughts, my questions, and my personalities :)