No.

No is a lovely word. No is a cute, short, little word. No is a word I don't have the right to.  Wait, that's not fair. I have the right to use the word "No" ... I just do not have the ability most of the time.  This should become apparent as I ramble on through this post. Cael wanted a blog entry... so guess what I'm doing! Yeah. Sucky part is I may complain or tease about the control he has but I love it. When he tells me to do an entry I smile and skip off to do it, and believe me with as sore as my thighs are right now skipping was not fucking easy!

 

First a diet update. Ready for it? READY?!                *Headdesk*                That sums it up. You see, I thought I would be so smart. I didn't want to go all the way to the basement to use the machines the other day. So, I did my cardio in my room. Bits and pieces from a dvd and random adaptations I did on my own. I? am fucking effective. My thighs hurt so badly I almost cried on the treadmill today. And getting up and down is a wonderful experience. As far as weight... I seem to keep losing and gaining the same few pounds. Its frustrating but since this is the first week with exercise and I have my period which means I gain a bit of (water)weight anyways so it's hard to judge. It's just a piss off. Seriously. So, refining my diet  a bit more.  My mom seems pretty damn happy about it...I make oatmeal in the morning and do enough for her... I've just been putting nuts and berries in it, no sugar. Soo good.

 

I spent a while cleaning out the jetted tub today. Its fairly big and the cat seems to think its a special made for her playground so it gets full of hair and needs to be cleaned out. I want to start taking a bath every night or every other night. With the bath salts and oils and bubbles it's so relaxing and I get soo warm(I love hot, hot, baths.) then by the time I cool down a bit I'm ready for bed, no matter what time it is. Plus... it has jets! *wiggles* which are so good. And I'm really hoping they help this sore thigh thing a bit. And I may be a little excited that I get to go through all my bath stuff. I have quite a bit, but I don't think I have any bubbles. However since I want the jets I can't use bubbles anyway. I do however want to use this. It smells amazing and makes me sooo soft. But! I have been out of it for a while and it's almost impossible to find. Yet I found it online...where I can't get it. Irony. I love the big can of it... it lasts a really long time. Sigh. I've been lusting at this a few days since I found it. One day I will find it!

 

Right now I'm curled up in my chair, waiting for 9 to roll around so I can start filling the tub. (It takes about an hour, but it's so worth it). Until then I will be talking to Cael. Which really, at this point should not be a surprise. By the time its 4 and he's home (though lately its been more like 5) I've been watching the clock wait until I can text him. It's a little sad. I really miss talking to him during the day. He is such a big part of my day, when he isn't there I miss him. Which really became clear when he had a photo shoot the other night. It was a time when we would have normally talked. And I sat there and looked at my mother and she laughed because I had no idea what to do with myself. I function without him... I'm fine without him, I just like it better when he's around. I'm used to doing whatever it is I'm doing AND talking to him. When I can't do that it's like somethings missing. I'd like to say this is the time that I end up talking to my pets, or randomly to myself but I do that anyways. Really. I amuse the hell out of my mother when she's laying in bed and she can hear me talking to myself out in the living room. Especially when I make myself laugh. And that? I think is all I have.