I went in and exchanged my shoes today. I got flat, black, pointed toe ones. They weren't my favourite but I wanted flats and that cut down on options A LOT. I'm just not steady enough to wear heels, let alone for 6 hours. Most of which will be spent standing.
While in town I also wanted to look for pants. Which was attempted. Big problem here was I want black pants. I found black pants.... They had no zipper. They were pull on pants. I hate those. Found some dark jeans...again, pull ons. I say wtf! What is with the pull on pants everywhere? I have no desire to wear those at all. So, as a result.. I still do not have pants for the wedding.
I did however manage to accomplish a haircut. I've been going to this girl for years. Nobody else has ever cut my hair, which really is a bonus. She knows how to cut my hair without royally fucking it, curl and all. Plus, when I go in and have no idea what I want we talk about it, I give guidelines and she does whatever the hell she wants. Today I picked the bangs and length and she layered, texturized it, and made it look pretty damn good. Knowing the person outside the salon is sooooo helpful. So is threatening to make them glue each hair back on if you don't like it.
Over the last 24 hours I've been doing a lot of thinking. Reevaluating really. Since B and I finished, I've been playing with and teasing Cael. I've teased Mark. I like to tease and somewhat flirt. It happens. Thing is, I don't want to just be a random text play session. I may not be ready for something more but eventually I'd like it. I don't want to be just a plaything. I think I deserve more than that. Being pigeonholed is not something I take kindly. Basically, I'm trying to decide which route I want to go. Neither seems that appealing right now.
Speaking of Mark he thoroughly grossed me out yesterday. He sent me a "I lick your neck" text. Out of nowhere. I had icky shivers going on as I read it. Being a smart ass I asked if he randomly licked peoples necks... to which he replied that he did. Cue gagging noises. I don't even like to hug people sometimes, licking is sooooooo not an option if I'm not dating the person. I mean really, when was the last time these people washed their necks? ... I hope he uses mouth wash...or sand paper. I'd still be grossed out.
Chris has found a girl. (Yeah, after his main reason for not dating me was he wanted to be single! HA! ... I'm not bitter.) This girl is a few years younger than he is. (I made a comment about it and he said I always date older, I can back with "I go up, not down!" I'm too funny for me some days) And a friend of his sister. This could go so badly it isn't even funny. I told him that and few other choice things when he asked my opinion... then he told me that I was always negative with him. Well, first... no I'm not. I'm positive. I'm positive that this is a bad choice and will end badly. See, Positive. He thinks I always assume that he's just going to leave. When I came back with the fact that he had left for weeks or months at a time when he dated girls before his response was basically that he was young. I said yes... and this is a door knob and that's a cat. Young has very little to do with it. I get that he's trying to be more careful and separate things this time... but all I have to go on is the past. Past behaviour is the best indicator of future behavior; and that has proved right every time for me. Hopefully it doesn't this time because now he's close enough I can kick his ass...and I have pointy shoes now, it would hurt way more!
Hmm, I think that's all I have today. My brain is so not up to functioning at full power lately.
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