Infinite Exhaustion

I am exhausted. I wrote a post for Eden Cafe earlier and it seems to have taken most of my energy. It's about a recent fantasy that I've had and just how unsure and fucked up I really am :) I'll make sure to post a link when it goes up.

Other than that I did some cleaning and running around in town. I got myself a new bra $60
 on for $10. I found some boots on sale the other day that I'm lusting at. Cael decided he needed to approve them before/if I get a pair. So, I sent him the links to look at. They go up to my knee and I really want a pair, whether it not or months from now. I did however learn from this experience. I have learned that Cael is slowly taking over my wardrobe. I don't buy bras anymore unless they're black or red. I'm sticking to the panties I find comfortable for now only because I don't want to get expensive stuff and lose weight and have it no longer fit me anymore. But those will go to the black and red variety unless I find something else that I really like and think he will as well. Most of my clothes are black but that's always been true. I've always liked corsets and cinchers and such but since he's been around I've started lusting at them a lot more. Right now, I still have clothing freedom because we both know that anything I wear right now wont be sticking around, but he still approves some pieces. When I move? Every. Single. Piece. Of. Clothing. Will be Cael approved. Especially since I don't drive.. he'd be taking me shopping. Lets face it though, he would be anyways. I like that he has that influence and control. And for days after I learned this I felt all warm and fuzzy. It's a happy feeling, and I've missed it. I haven't had rules to enforce that happy feeling and I kind of blocked that feeling out until the other night. I've been happy for days. :)

Yesterday I made an apple compote and canned it for my oatmeal... I'm excited for oatmeal weather now. I also made a seafood soup, which my father deemed "Too fishy" .... Seriously? SEAFOOD soup. *shakes head*


Right now, all I can think of is having a bath and going to bed, so I am going to go make supper and make that happen.