I'm going to explain this quickly and briefly because I feel better today and there is no point in dwelling on it.
Before B and I were exclusive Cael and I used to play over text occasionally. This ended about a year or so ago. Since B and I are finished and I have been in an upswell of horny lately, we figured we would try again.
Turns out I was not ready. We got a few minutes in and I had the odd tear... which I honestly was expecting. But, then he hit a button I didn't know I had. I think awhile ago I posted about how B was teaching me how to beg... we never finished that lesson, we were still in the process when he pulled his Houdini act. Cael asked me to beg... and I started to bawl. Which I was not expecting at all. However, considering that 1 I hadn't really cried over this yet and 2 I'm perilously close to my period.... it really was bound to happen I guess. I cried... and cried..and cried until I ended up getting sick. Be it the crying or just a physical response, I don't know. But it happened and it taught me I need to go a little slower.
I'm pretty much fine in general but sexually I'm not there yet. And that's okay because I will be eventually.
As promised :
That is all for today I think, I have a ton of stuff to do today. Joy.