Friday, March 4, 2011

Peace And Serenity...I Hope I Find You One Day

It's March. You know what that means?! Question month! Now, I know most of you will email me with questions randomly no matter what month it is and that's great. However, for those of you who don't or those that do that have more...send them in! I'll answer almost anything, almost because I've seen some of the minds that read this blog and making it a blanket statement just seems bad.

Other than that there isn't much going on. I'm working constantly on Sociology again. It's taking up a lot of my time.  Well, that and making faces in Caels direction. I still haven't adjusted to having him in school again. I pretty much always have that slight ache of "I miss him" going on. He's pretty busy between being in school all day and doing homework after, generally until he's ready for bed. I get a few texts throughout the night, generally earlier before he gets sucked into the work. Which I really am quite happy and appreciative of because I know he doesn't have to text me. I've had the relationship where I wasn't talked to for days, so that he still does even when he's busy means something but Gods I still miss him.

It's a big adjustment in general going from getting so much of his time to it going else where, when you add-on to that the submissive need for their dominant... I'm ready to curl up and live in his pocket some days. Some days I'm totally okay with it though.. seems I'm all whimmy too. I suspect some of my pout over it is pms induced so I'm monitoring it. Why pout and throw a tantrum when it's hormone induced not mood? Why waste a perfectly good tantrum! :)  Actually most of it comes from know that he still makes a bit of time for me and that in the end the schooling is a good thing for him and eventually even us as a whole even if it does suck right now.

I have the same attitude with my schooling right now. I don't necessarily need these courses..I could take lesser easier ones if I just wanted to get done. But! Taking these courses will set me up for things further down the road. I want to try writing, while I will need a random job until I get things going and find a way to profit from it, writing is what I want to do. But I'm setting it up so if I fail or am unhappy I can easily go back to school and take another route.  So again, in the long run I am better off doing it this way even if I am burnt out on the schooling. Doing it will benefit me more than if I don't.

The only thing I'm dealing with right now is a bit of insecurity (which again could be entirely pms induced...who needs this shit!?) because Cael is so busy. Which I realize doesn't make much sense. Luckily I know myself enough to realize this is probably all hormonal and as such has no basis. He picked me, he's stayed around for a quite a long time, he want's me to move in with him.. I have no reason to be insecure.

Femininity sucks ass some days. *Sage nod*