Wednesday, March 30, 2011


My internet has been fuckered, thus I have missed posts. Not only my posts but others as well.  Over the next bit I'll write make up posts but for now, a small summary of a few things.

  • I am now defining Cael and I as C/s ....Cael/serene. M/s O/p D/s ... none of it fits. And TTWD (This Thing We Do) irritates me so we are C/s. *nods* He is in control, I wear the shiny thing...I don't have enough energy to delve in and explain every detail of what we are.

  • I missed posts on a few beloved blogs. Some of those blogs are now locked. Some of them deleted. Some of them state either on their blog or elsewhere that their relationship with their dominant has come to an end. We as readers definitely get invested in those writing blogs. We all hurt for them. And while I do.. I also get concerned. Some of these blogs that have disappeared were long-term relationships. I don't mean 5 years. I mean 10, 15, 20 plus years together. Living together, married or not is hard enough. This lifestyle can add extra strain, extra attention and care to it. When I see people I've talked to, who I've heard gush about their partners 15 years in suddenly disappear and split... it's a scary thing. It reinforces how much time and commitment is needed to the lifestyle and more importantly to each other.With every blip, or fall out I see... I curl that much tighter around Cael. I value him and the way we interact THAT much more. Both of us seemed to think along the same lines as far as relationships. You don't give up. You don't walk away. You work on it and try to fix what's wrong. There's very little that can't be overcome if you work at it hard enough. I'm not saying that these people didn't do that. For all we know they may have been trying for months or years. I'm just glad we both think that way. So far we've had a couple little blips, both from him and from myself. Hell, we've watched the other date, submit, master and play with other people for almost 4 years. Yet we still came back to each other. Every. Time.Seeing people throwing out the lifestyle, or their marriage/relationship seems to push me closer to him. Not because I'm scared that we'll fail too, but because I love knowing that if we do...we try again. We try a different route. Seeing things fall apart in person or on the web is like a mini eye opener to remember what I have and how long/hard I fought to get it. I luff that man to absolute fucking pieces and I don't think there's anything short of death that would get me to walk the other way.

  • On a happier note... Cael is getting a fantasy realized at some point. He brought up playing with a couple. Female subs of course. He wants to watch me play with other girls, and he was oh so smooth bringing it up too ( -.^ ). But I am open to the idea...provided I like the girl and am comfortable with everything to do with it.

  • Cael and I have been talking about furniture lately. We both want huge oversized chairs. At this rate we may both end up with one. They go in the man cave... along with the foam throwing bricks and pool noodles for beating each other with. ...Seriously can't wait to have Sephi over :D

Now, I am exhausted. I am going to bed.

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